Never Too Late
by chisoxtam14
Summary: After the house party Anna and Bates are finally moving on. They're happy and rebuilding their life together. That is until Lady Mary shares the news of Green's death. Will Anna be able to overcome her suspicions about her husband's involvement or will they force the couple apart? Will it be too late to say I'm sorry? Trigger and spoiler warning for S4.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: **This is my first multi-chapter fic, so be gentle.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything when it comes to DA.

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><p><strong>Chapter I<strong>

His bag was nearly packed when she came into the room. His back stiffened at her presence but he didn't turn to face her. He knew what he'd see if he looked at her; a small glimmer of love over powered by despair and anger. He was familiar enough with it. She watched his back for a moment, so broad but his shoulders seemed smaller, defeated almost; they were usually so squared and strong. A sudden ache came on tightening her chest. The sight of him in _their_ bedroom shouldn't be so foreign to her, but it was all the same. She wanted to go to him throw her arms around him and reassure him that her love for him was still there, despite all appearances that had now become their daily lives. But she couldn't bring herself to. She felt she no longer had the right.

"I'm almost done here. Then I'll be out of your way." He spoke softly, still not facing her. She saw his strong arms reach out for a shirt lying on the bed, and she was envious of that shirt. It had been at least a week since she had felt his gentle strength. She sighed.

"You're not in my way…it's your room too," she said weakly and not at all convincing. He lifted his head at the statement before harshly tossing a brush and a tin of pomade into the valise.

"Is it?" He snorted. He regretted it immediately and more so when he heard her sharp intake of breath at the comment. His shoulders slumped as tears gathered in her eyes. He grabbed his bag from the bed and steeled himself to see her. When he turned he couldn't help but to notice how small she seemed, scrunched up in the doorway holding onto the frame for balance. Every part of him ached to hold her, to offer her comfort and tell her that everything was going to be alright. But that wasn't who they were anymore. He made his way to the door, stopping at her side so they were arm to arm. She didn't look up at him and he didn't lower his gaze to her.

"I'm not sure how long we'll be. A week at least, maybe longer. A welcome break, I think. For the both of us." His tone reflected doubt and all he wanted to hear was her rebuttal of such a statement; that she could never want a break from him. Silence was all she offered, he wasn't surprised.

"I love you." His voice was barely a whisper and he didn't wait for her to respond before he headed down the stairs and out of the cottage. She stood in the doorway holding on until the sobs became too much and she slumped to the floor.

It had been fifteen months since the night of the house party; the night that had stolen the Anna May Bates that everyone, including herself, had known. And nearly a year had passed since she moved back into the cottage that had once been her dream come true. They made progress every day, together. The nightmares subsided and her smile emerged more and more. Genuine smiles, mostly for him, but randomly as well. Eventually, days at a time would pass before the darkness of that night would encompass them. But then they would rear their tortuous heads. These shadows would creep up as a flashback or a nightmare. Sometimes even a touch memory would raise the alarm, as in one instance when she was brushing her hair and the brush caught unexpectedly on a tangle. The force of the brush jerked her head and suddenly she could feel his grip on her scalp dragging her towards the boot room. She choked on her sobs and sat there shaking until her lovely husband talked her down. His voice and words had always been the most soothing thing in the world to her. So gentle and soft coming from such a mountain of a man. He would come to her side just using his words until she calmed enough to crawl into his arms. Before, when she was upset or even in the wake of intense love making, he would run his hands through her long golden locks and the action would always soothe her into a blissful state. It was an action greatly missed by both of them. A house party casualty.

But these instances were becoming fewer and fewer as time went on. As afraid as she had been to tell him what had happened she was amazed by the support she found in him and the comfort of being back in their home. They worked out a new routine, one that she was comfortable with. She couldn't get dressed or undressed in front of him, not yet. At first she didn't want him to see the extent of the bruising but even after the marks faded she realized it was her own insecurities about what he would think or see when he looked at her body. She didn't recognize her own body now, how could he? When she was in the bedroom changing, John keeping himself busy downstairs until she called for him, she would study her naked form in the full size mirror that stood in the corner. It had taken weeks before she could face a mirror but now she sometimes felt it hard to stop scrutinizing herself. She saw _his_ hands here and there, everywhere on her. Surely, John could see them too if he looked at her properly. He would be disgusted and reject her. So she kept her body to herself, wearing only her most modest night dresses and making her way to the bed pulling the blankets up around her neck before calling for John.

He would always smile at her when he came in before gathering his things and going to change in the bathroom. Then he would join her very slowly in their bed, keeping himself to himself. No more did they fall asleep completely entwined in each other's bodies. He breathing in the scent of her hair as she nuzzled into his chest, their legs tangled and their most sensitive areas brushing each other causing mischievous smiles to appear on both their faces. Of all things, he missed that the most. Nothing needed to come of it, just being that close to her, feeling all of her and hearing her contented sighs, knowing that she felt as happy in his arms as he felt holding her was…well, there simply was nothing better in this world. She missed sleeping in his arms more than anything as well. Although this commonality was not known to them as neither dared to speak of it.

One night she had awoken when it was still dark, the moonlight spilling from the window and landing on her husband who was sleeping peacefully and soundly on his side, facing her. She took this time to study him and couldn't help but to smile and without even thinking she had brushed her hand across his forehead and pushed that same lock of hair that had a mind of its own out of his eye. She startled a bit when she realized that this had been one of the first times she had touched him like this since that night. A slight twinge of panic started in her, but his skin was so soft and he felt so good under her fingertips that the good memories that flooded her brain kept the panic at bay. She couldn't help but to trace the rest of his face with feather-light touches concluding with his soft lips. She missed those as well, terribly. Unconsciously, she brought her fingertips to her own lips and closed her eyes. Flooded with images of every kiss they had ever shared she became short of breath and her eyes shot open in surprise of the intense longing she was feeling. She noticed then the great divide between them on the mattress and she frowned at the sight of it. A foot, perhaps two of empty mattress space between them, another divide that had been introduced because of that night. Slowly and ever so slightly she began to close the gap. At that moment she there was nowhere she wanted to be more than in his arms. She placed her head on his chest and slid an arm around his waist and fell asleep almost instantly.

Then the nightmare had come. When she woke up and saw a man so close to her, feeling him against her, she panicked and had shoved John as hard as she could succeeding in throwing him out of the bed. He'd landed hard on his bad leg and had trouble getting around for days afterward. The whole thing had been a grave set back, even through all of his assurances that it was fine and he felt no ill will towards her from it. But with every wince of pain she saw in his eyes, she felt them in her heart and despaired over thinking that she would never again know the peace and serenity that came with sleeping in her husband's arms. She had been too scared since to try again. Another house party casualty.

But despite the setbacks, they were managing and little victories were being won every day; a touch, a smile, a holding of hands or linking of arms and eventually soft chaste brushes of lips. It seemed that they were truly on their way back to themselves. Things were never quite going to be as they once were, they knew that. What happened that night and the aftermath of distrust and dishonesty was always going to be present in some form. It was just up to them and time to make sure its presence was kept back and not given the liberty to take up precious space in their life together. Days at a time began to pass without so much as a glimpse of the shadow. They began living each day for that day only, not taking the time to dwell on the failures of yesterday or the fears of tomorrow. In the present is where they stayed and as they looked into each other's eyes they needn't worry about anything else.

That is until the day of the church bazaar when Lady Mary had delivered the news that Green was dead and her world, that was already standing on just pillars of sand, came crashing down all over again.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:** This whole thing seemed so much longer in Word than on here, but oh well.

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

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><p><strong>Chapter II<strong>

As the days passed since the news of Green's death Anna's suspicions and fears only grew. The fear and anxiety from her actual attack had dissipated only to be taken over by the new fear of losing her husband to the gallows. It was a constant struggle within her every day; her mind thinking he had done it while her heart refused to believe it. She had asked him if he would ever do anything to jeopardize the life they had finally managed to build for themselves and he had been evasive. He hadn't answered her, not really. He could never really bring himself to lie to her directly, so he would answer her in riddles or change the subject. He would also never make a promise to her he knew he couldn't keep. She thought back to when he was still in prison and they were so close to getting him out, if only someone could convince Mrs. Bartlett to change her story back to the truth. He had said, "leave it to me." She had asked him not to do anything stupid, tried to make him promise, but he merely looked at her before turning his attention to Mr. Murray and simply saying, "leave it to me." The meaning of this was not lost on her. He was going to do something foolish that she wouldn't approve of, but he wouldn't break a promise to her so he simply avoided making one, as if that made it alright. He also wouldn't tell her where he had gone or what he had been up to on the day that Green died. He had left the estate and apparently gone into York for the day, leaving at dawn. That was all she knew. He only offered more clever and evasive talk to get out of answering directly and honestly when she questioned him about it. His non-answers left her feeling cold and shut out. She wondered if this is how he had felt in those weeks after her attack when she had done the same. She was growing so fearful of the choice she knew deep down he had made. And the more her fear grew the more her anger did as well at him for risking simply everything she held dear, namely himself.

It was this silence and all that was going unsaid between them that had led them to where they now stood. Husband and wife living together in a small cottage they both adored with an ocean between them. She felt herself pushing him away just as she had immediately following her attack but she couldn't stop herself. Every time he made a gesture of love, whether presenting her with a small flower he had spotted on his way home to her or telling her how beautiful she was to him, she rebuffed him. She could see the pain in his eyes, but she steeled herself to it. She found herself growing short with him at everything and he didn't understand. His patience which up until now had seemed endless was now wearing thin. He had thought they were past this point. He walked on eggshells around her and gave her space up at the Abbey when they were working, but he couldn't do anything right by her any more. There was something she wasn't telling him. He tried time and again to get her to open up, but she wouldn't. When he looked into her eyes he saw fear and anger. It wasn't what he saw following her attack. Her eyes then looked through him when filled with fear and anxiety. When they focused on him he could see them soften and he could see love in them for him. It was what helped him help her as much as he could. Maybe it hadn't been enough. What he saw now in her eyes, though, was different. When she looked at him with all that despair and fear and anger in her eyes, she saw him, directly him. Her gaze bore into his soul and those emotions followed all too diligently. He must have done something this time, but he had no idea what. He spent lonely nights awake for hours pouring over every moment of every day he could remember but nothing stood out to him. He was hurting and had no idea how to tell her such. How, after all she had been through, how could he tell her that she was hurting him? He wouldn't add to the high levels of guilt she was already constantly buried under. He hoped every day that he was just being too sensitive. And he prayed honest-to-god prayers that she would come back to him just as he thought she had after that night.

It had all come to a head a week ago. They were both exhausted from the dinner party that had kept them on their feet until very late into the night, not to mention the tension between them causing both of them sleepless nights and immeasurable stress. It was well after one in the morning when they finally headed home to the cottage. He had offered his arm to her for the walk and she refused it, pretending that she hadn't noticed the gesture and walking purposefully faster than he could keep up with. She reached the cottage first and seemed annoyed to have to wait for him to arrive with the key.

"Let me help you with your coat."

"I can do it. I'm not a child!"

"Anna…I know you're not...I was just…"

"Don't try and be all helpful now. Not when…" she stopped herself. She wanted to yell and scream at him for throwing their life away. She was living in complete fear that any day, any moment men would show up again with their iron cuffs and drag him away from her. He wouldn't be spared and she would be widowed. Yes, she doubted his guilt, she didn't really have proof other than a gut feeling and his avoidance of his whereabouts that day, but those doubts couldn't stand up to the feelings she had that he had been responsible. She had only survived his prison term last time because she knew he was innocent. Now she had no such conviction to help her through. Now she would have to try and live knowing he had sacrificed his life to..to what? She didn't even know. It was just all selfish to her. An act of vengeance and retaliation she didn't want nor need. She didn't need him to avenge her. All she needed was him by her side for the rest of their lives, happy and without the threat of the law lingering over their heads again. Why couldn't he understand that the greatest revenge either could hope for was to love each other and live their lives as happily as possible? To move on and not let that man and that night win, that was the sweetest vengeance. There was no doubt about the outcome this time; he would be hanged. This was the image of her nightmares now. Green was long gone, replaced by the sounds of a trap door and a sickening crack. How could he? How dare he? Why couldn't he understand that? Why couldn't she bring herself to put a voice to these fears?

"What do you mean? Not when what? What's going on, Anna? Please just talk to me. If I've done something I wish you'd just tell me. Don't put me back in that place…don't shut me out again, please I can't bear it. We were doing so well. I thought we were happy again…" his voice trailed off as emotion strangled him. His eyes were filling, but he turned away to focus on hanging his coat up trying to get himself under control.

"How can we be when I've been…when you've…" she pursed her lips and shook her head. "I've got headache. I'm going to bed." She began to walk away, defiant. This was his doing after all. He made his choice and she was going to pay for it, selfish foolish man.

"Fine, walk away. Shut me out again. " He was angry now. He didn't want to be, it broke him whenever he felt anger towards her, but he was also hurt and confused. Why couldn't she ever confide in him? Had he been anything else than supportive since he had learned of what she'd been through? He never pushed her to talk when she didn't want to. He never pushed her for any type of intimacy; just having her back under their roof was enough to sustain him for the rest of his life. He opened his arms and ears whenever she did finally come to him with his whole heart open just for her. But these last few weeks made it seem like she was inventing reasons to get mad at him. If he made her a cup of tea it was too weak or too strong. Or he put too much sugar in it and not enough milk or vice versa. He knew how she liked her tea. He had made it the same way every single time for the last twelve years. Now it was wrong. When he cleaned the cottage he put things away in the wrong spot or not in the right way, although he couldn't spot any difference except he had done it and not her. He felt horrible in thinking it, as he never wanted to leave her, ever, especially when she was so obviously going through something, but his lordship was headed to London in the next week and a deeply buried part of Bates was relieved. Maybe the time apart would do them some good. "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" after all.

She stopped at the foot of the stairs at his words, but just for a moment before hanging her head and walking up. She paced their bedroom for a while before slowly changing for bed. She hated fighting with him but she just couldn't keep her emotions under control. It was as if her mind was already preparing for his absence should the worst happen. Her brain was so angry at him for taking away their future, for making a foolish choice on her behalf. Her heart, however, was not behind this preparation. It ached for him as it did every day, the happy ones and the bad ones. Every beat of her heart was for him, for better or worse. As angry as she was at herself and at him, her heart told her to go to him. She was angry but she loved him, more than anything, and as her mum always said, never go to bed angry. She didn't know what she was going to say but she needed to give reassurance and hopefully receive some in return. Gathering her courage with a large swallow of air she opened the door to ask him to come up. She was surprised though when she saw the hallway dark and no light coming from downstairs. Then she noticed the door to the spare room was closed when they always kept it open. There was a faint flicker of candle light coming from under the door then it was gone. She put a hand up to knock but didn't. In resignation she went to bed, not falling asleep for hours, and when she did all she saw was him standing on a platform with a noose around his neck.

It was early when she woke again. They wouldn't need to get ready for the day for another hour or so. She slipped out of bed hoping to crawl into his arms and hold him close as an apology. The door to the spare room was open this time, but he wasn't there. She immediately ran downstairs but he was gone. She collapsed on the settee and cried. She couldn't understand herself at all. When he was gone all she wanted was him near. When alone, she wanted his arms around her holding her tight and never letting her go. She wanted to press her lips to his until they both died in a state of bliss from lack of oxygen. She longed for the sight of him at every turn she took when they were at the Abbey, even just a glimpse would bring a smile to her face. But when those opportunities presented themselves, even in the privacy of their home, all she could feel was fear and anger. So she pushed and he was helpless to fight her. He was always helpless when it came to her. Her every whim was his command, for better or worse. Two guesses as to which this time was.

"What is wrong with me!?" She wailed through her tears. Maybe he would never be found out. Maybe their time wasn't running out. And even if it was, is this the way she really wanted to spend their last days together? And maybe, just maybe, please lord, maybe he hadn't done anything wrong at all. Maybe he hadn't made that choice. She wanted to believe that, but she couldn't stop thinking he had condemned them.

And that is how the next week passed. In silence. In avoidance. He slept every night in the spare room and left every morning for the Abbey without her. Now it was time for him to leave for London with his lordship. She felt the same way she had when he was supposed to have gone to America. If only he had gone with him, they might have been spared this hell they were now living in. Not that she blamed him for staying, he didn't want to leave her and she didn't want him to leave. At the time, there had not been a choice.

She had made her way to the cottage hoping to catch him before he left. There was so much that needed to be said, but when she saw him standing there packing his bag she couldn't manage to get a word out. He was steps in front of her but an ocean away. She didn't know how to cross it. He knew she was there but he wouldn't look at her. He didn't turn to address her when speaking or when spoken to and she couldn't bring herself to go to him. So he had left, leaving behind the saddest 'I love you' she had ever heard. She returned the sentiment but much too softly and too late for him to have heard.

She waited for his usual phone call to tell her they had arrived safely but it never came. Nor did a single letter. She had only herself to blame for this and the guilt was wearing her down. She was listless and pale. She barely ate at meal times or spoke to anyone. Mrs. Hughes was quick to pick up on this as Anna had remained under her close surveillance since that terrible night. She knew something had not been right between the two tormented lovers the last few weeks and it broke her heart. They had seemed to come through hell together eventually in the wake of the attack but recently the rift had returned. Mr. Bates had been turning up to the Abbey peculiarly early every morning, not taking breakfast but stealing a piece of bread off of Mrs. Patmore and sometimes a quick cup of tea before disappearing into the house for the duration of the day. Anna would arrive and the way her eyes darted about Mrs. Hughes knew she was looking for him but he didn't want to be found. Now that Mr. Bates was in London Anna looked like a lost and frightened puppy. She had been acting clumsy and forgetful. And her work, which was usually executed with great skill, care and expediency, was now slow and mistake riddled. She was truly lost without him.

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><p><strong>AN: ** Bates and Anna fighting, I know, I know. It's a bit OOC, but there's so much we don't get to see with their home life. As much as we love them and want them to be perfect they are only human. And I think that even Bates' patience with Anna could wear thin eventually. Don't hold it against me!


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: **Mrs. Hughes makes a big appearance and a big difference. Basically she's the Yoda of the Abbey.

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

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><p><strong>Chapter III<strong>

"Anna, would you please join me for a moment?" the housekeeper had caught her as she was about to return to the cottage for the night. Anna sighed, she was exhausted and just wanted to get home, but she couldn't refuse. She knew her work had been suffering visibly and she was in for a scolding. She put her coat back on the hook and headed towards the housekeeper's sitting room.

"Would you like a cup of tea?" Mrs. Hughes offered.

"No thank you." Anna was polite but short. "I know what this is about Mrs. Hughes. I know my work hasn't been up to standard lately, I…I just haven't been myself. I don't know what's wrong with me." She couldn't hold in the tears and they rushed out of her as if a dam had broken. Mrs. Hughes rushed to her side and pulled Anna into a reassuring hug.

"Oh my dear girl, this has nothing to do with your work. I'm worried about you. You and Mr. Bates seemed to be doing so well, but I've noticed recently the divide seems to have returned. I just want you to know that I'm here for you and make sure that you're ok. I know how hard it must be on you with him gone."

"Oh it's not just that…" the floodgates had opened and Anna couldn't stop herself. Mrs. Hughes had been there for her through every trial she had ever gone through in her life since she was a young girl of fifteen, far more of a mother than her superior. "It's the way he left. We'd had such an awful fight and it's all my fault. I never got to say I'm sorry or that I love him before he left. He won't call or write. It's all my fault."

"Oh Anna, I can't believe you could have done anything so wrong to make him shut you out that way. It's not right, he shouldn't be leaving you in the lurch like this."

"No Mrs. Hughes, you don't understand. I've… I've been pushing him away for weeks. I can't help but to think that he…he…" she had never actually spoken this accusation aloud. She wasn't sure she'd be able to as if saying the words aloud would make them an absolute truth. She began to shake and choke on her tears. Mrs. Hughes, ever perceptive and intuitive, didn't need her to go on.

"You think he had something to do with Green's death don't you? You think he killed him." These weren't really questions. Through her tears Anna met the housekeeper's sincere eyes and nodded her head. Hearing this voiced by a third party only made Anna feel more guilty for thinking the worst of the man she loved more than anything.

"And I'm so…I'm so angry and hurt! Why!? How could he throw our life away like that?! He doesn't have that right! He's always making choices for me, why doesn't he trust me enough to make my own or involve me in things that would have consequences for the both of us? Why was he so selfish?!" Anna went on for several minutes throwing accusations and asking questions without answers.

The housekeeper let the lady's maid have her bout and sat quietly listening to everything she said. When it seemed she had calmed and gotten all that had been bottled up for too long out, Mrs. Hughes began to speak slowly, trying to choose her words carefully.

"Anna, before this, have you ever known Mr. Bates to be a selfish man?" The question seemed to throw Anna for a loop; it was not what she was expecting. She pondered for moment before responding with a simple shake of her head. Mrs. Hughes accepted this and continued.

"And of all the decisions he's ever made for the two of you has he ever had anything but your best interest at heart? Has he ever acted in a less than noble way?" Another silent 'no' was given. Before going on the housekeeper took a deep breath.

"Anna, do you have any proof that Mr. Bates was involved in Green's death?" Mrs. Hughes held her breath. The weight of a simple train ticket laid heavily on her mind, but even she didn't see that as definitive proof that Mr. Bates had been involved. There were a thousand reasons why he might have gone to London, more than that there was no proof in the ticket that he had gone to London on the day in question.

"No. No proof. But why won't he tell me where he went that day? Why has he remained silent and evasive about what he was up to? I don't want to think this of my husband Mrs. Hughes. But I know him. He even told me when he thinks of what happened he wants to murder! Then that man turns up dead on a day when Mr. Bates had been away all day. I can't help but to think it. I even feel it in my bones. My head says he did it, but my heart won't believe it." The tears started again, not wracking sobs, but a gentle flow of heartbreak.

"I know you don't want to think him capable of such a thing. You love him. And, I'll tell you Anna, I don't think he had a single thing to do with it. I truly don't believe that after everything he would make a decision that would take him away from you forever. A decision that would ruin your life even more than his own. He only ever thinks of you and how he can make you happy. It is what drives that man every moment of every day. It's obvious to anyone with a heart and a pair of eyes. Now, I can't tell you what he was up to that day, only he can. But have you asked him if he was involved?"

"No, I still haven't told him who it was. I'm not even sure he knows it was Green."

"Well then. I know you don't want to punish him, but can't you see that you're driving him away before even giving him a chance to explain?"

"But I've asked him what he was up to that day! He won't tell me!"

"Anna, that's not quite the same thing. If he knew what you're thinking, if he knew this was the reason you've been so distance, don't you think he'd be honest with you? Don't you think he deserves that chance? Green is dead now and good riddance to that evil piece of filth, what harm could it do to tell him now?" These words hit Anna hard. They rang so very true. If these events and all the past events of their life had taught them anything it was that no good came from hiding the truth. Anna had thought she was doing the right thing when she kept the truth of her attack and attacker from John, but what good had it done? Look where it had gotten them. Maybe if she had been honest with him from the beginning they would be together and happy with no oceans between them. Maybe if she had been honest and upfront about the full extent of her fears for his life he would have taken them to heart and not done something foolish.

"I think you're right Mrs. Hughes. I've been such a fool. Nothing good comes from keeping the truth buried and telling lies to cover your tracks. Maybe if I had been honest with him everything would be different and better right now." Anna spoke with conviction but Mrs. Hughes wasn't convinced that was all there was to it.

"Anna, I understand what a weight these suspicions have put upon you but are you sure that's all there is too it? Has your fear about the truth behind Green's death really been enough to force you to separate from Mr. Bates?" Anna's mouth fell open; it was as if this woman was reading her inner most soul. How did she know that the truth about Green was just part of why she had been pushing John away? "It's not is it? There's something else keeping you from being happy with him. What is it, please my girl, you need to tell someone if it can't be him."

"I'm so…I'm so scared Mrs. Hughes." Anna began to shake terribly. She had scarcely admitted to herself these feelings, she kept them buried in the deepest parts of her, but she felt them bubbling over now. She tried to harden herself, to not let them out, but as she looked into the housekeeper's kind warm eyes her resolve weakened to nothing.

"Scared of what, Anna?" They sat in silence and Mrs. Hughes was sure Anna was going to run out of her office now and never look back. She reached and placed a hand tenderly upon Anna's, hoping it wouldn't be too much. After a moment, Anna placed her free hand on the housekeeper's and drew a deep breath.

"The happier we've become the last few months the more scared I've become. I would forget everything for a day or two at a time and I truly thought we were past it all, or getting there. But then I started to have all these thoughts and I've been so scared. I'm so afraid to be happy, Mrs. Hughes. I feel like every time we've had a bit of peace and happiness something terrible has come along to ruin it. I'm afraid that maybe we're not made for happiness. And I'm afraid that he won't love who I am now. Because I'm not the same woman I was. I never will be her again. I'm not entirely different and sometimes I even forget myself that I've been tainted, but then I remember. I can't laugh like I did. I will never be trusting or open like I was. And we haven't…I still can't…I mean…" she was embarrassed to bring up such a thing in the presence of her boss. But Mrs. Hughes understood and nodded to show such, giving Anna's hand a squeeze of encouragement to continue. "I still see that man all over my body, I don't know if I'll ever not see it. And if I can see it, then Mr. Bates must as well, surely. How can he want me now? I can't see it in his eyes anymore Mrs. Hughes, that look that tells me I'm the most beautiful woman in the world to him. He tells me I'm beautiful every day, but to me, it sounds hollow. I can't believe it when he says it. Maybe, I don't believe it because he no longer means it. And if I can't be that for him, if I can't give him…the things that a wife should, why would he want to stay with me? I'm not good enough for him. How could he love me now?" When Mrs. Hughes' soft chuckle hit Anna's ears, she started with a shock and pulled back from the housekeeper's grasp.

"I'm sorry m'dear. I'm not laughing at you or taking lightly what you've said. But do you have any idea just how similar you and that husband of yours are? I seem to remember some time back a similar conversation with a Mr. John Bates about the woman sitting here before me who is now his wife. He going on and on about how you couldn't be real. How he was so undeserving of the 'best and most beautiful woman on earth,' his exact words." She paused to offer a wink and a smile, before continuing. "How many times have you told me that Mr. Bates asked you this very same thing before and after you married him? An infuriating amount, I believe you said. And how would you answer him? Do you remember?" Anna swallowed hard and nodded yes.

"I asked him why he couldn't see himself as I saw him. He never thought he was worthy of me because he is older and has a limp that I stopped noticing a day after I met him. He said I deserved someone younger and more attractive with money enough to offer me the world. He didn't realize that the only world I needed was the one in which he loved me as I loved him. Everything else was trivial and didn't matter to me one bit, because I love him as he is. For all he was and what he had been through. I love him for him…" Anna trailed off as the recognition of what she was saying hit her. The way she was feeling now was exactly how he must have felt all these years.

"And when Mr. Bates was in prison and his letters had stopped you thought he was telling you to make a life without him. To move on, which made you so angry because how dare he think that your love for him was so fickle that you could just go on without him. Am I right?" Anna didn't need to answer. Of course she was right. She had been angry that he could think such things. "So don't you see how similar these situations are? Anna, that man breathes for you. Do you really think he could even give a second's thought to a life that didn't have you in it? Do you think that anything under the sun could make him love you less? Because I don't. I see his love for you in everything he does. He may think he's the definition of stoicism and for everything else he'd be right, but not when it comes to you."

"Oh Mrs. Hughes!" Anna practically leapt into the housekeeper's arms, holding her tight. "He does love me doesn't he? He loves me so much, as I love him. I can't believe what a fool I've been. I'm going to London tomorrow with Lady Mary. I must see him. He has to know that I still love him, no matter what. And if he did…have something to do with Green's death this can't be how we spend our last days if that's what to be."

"Don't think like that. Don't think of this as the end, I have faith it's just the start of a new chapter. A chapter that will be a fresh start for the two of you. No secrets. Nothing hiding in the shadows. No doubts. This is just your beginning, Mrs. Bates." The two women sat in silence and held each other for a long time before Anna pulled away and made to leave. As she reached for the door she turned;

"Thank you Mrs. Hughes. More than I can ever say, for everything you've ever done for me. Thank you for saving our lives tonight." Moved to tears the housekeeper could only nod.

Anna made her way to the cottage with fervor and a renewed confidence she had never felt. She began to pack with a smile on her face the entire time. And when she slept that night she didn't dream of her husband being taken away from her, instead she dreamt of being reunited with him in more ways than one. She dreamt of his arms around her and kissing his lips with every ounce of passion and love she could put into them. She slept soundly and through the whole night for the first time in months.

There hadn't been time to get to Mr. Bates the next day when they arrived in London. Much to her chagrin they had missed their planned train and therefore had arrived in London much later than anticipated. Anna had to immediately prepare Lady Mary for her dinner with Lord Gillingham that night and Lady Mary had bogged her down with preparations for the next day. But no matter. After making inquiries of Lady Mary about what Lord Grantham might have planned for the day, Lady Mary had assured her that papa would be busy with meetings and that Bates would have some free time in the afternoon. Lady Mary had seen right through her maid, and with the way Anna had been excitable and fidgety the whole day she knew she must be anxious to see her husband after these days apart. Lady Mary may not have known everything that happened between those two but she knew enough of what had happened that she wanted Anna to have every chance to heal with her husband. Anna smiled a gracious smile at Lady Mary before thanking her for understanding. The two women said their goodnights and Anna hurried off to bed. The sooner she slept the sooner it would be tomorrow and she would finally be in his arms.

When Anna was awoken quite unexpectedly a few hours later she was surprised and confused to see that it was by Lady Mary. She began to rush out of bed and started apologizing for over sleeping when she noticed it was still dark outside and that Lady Mary's eyes were red and her face had a look of horror and sadness about them.

"Oh Anna…" Lady Mary began. An overwhelming sense of dread filled her and she fell back down on the bed shaking her head.

"No." She didn't need Lady Mary to continue. This was a dream it had to be a dream. "Don't…no…no…"

"Anna, I'm so sorry, but there's been an accident…"

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><p><strong>AN:** Ok now I really ask for your forgiveness. Don't hate me and stay tuned! Please!


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:** Thank you all so much for your kind reviews! I know I pulled kind of a d*** move leaving off where I did, but we all love/hate cliffhangers don't we? Thank you so much for sticking with me. I was actually quite pleasantly surprised at the positive responses to Anna and Bates fighting. As characters in the show in the place and time they are it doesn't allow for a lot of emotion, but I can't help but thinking of how much we miss out on seeing. Heaven knows there has never been enough "cottage time" shown and I don't think they would have been able to always keep everything so bottled up, especially when alone at home. Anyways, thank you all so so much! So it's time to find out...is Bates dead or alive?

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing. *sigh*

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><p><strong>Chapter IV<strong>

She didn't know how she got dressed. She didn't know how she got out the door and out of the house. She didn't know who was speaking or what was being said. She didn't know anything and nothing made sense. There couldn't be anything, not without him. This couldn't be real. Her mind was empty, her body completely numb.

"Anna? …Anna?" Lady Mary's voice echoed in her head. She sounded miles away in her head, although she was vaguely aware that the Lady was right by her side holding her hand. "Anna, can you hear me?" Anna only meagerly nodded her head. They were in the motor on their way to the hospital. Anna was trying to piece together what had just happened. Lady Mary had come into her room and woken her up. It was still dark and Lady Mary had tears on her cheeks. She had been told there had been an accident and she had felt her body fall onto the bed. She had yelled at Lady Mary, told her to stop talking; that what she was saying wasn't true. It couldn't be true. 'There's been an accident…' the words repeated over and over again. Beyond that, there was no news.

The constable who had come to the club to deliver the news had very few details; he couldn't even reassure the Earl that his valet was alive. He had only said the situation was very grim. Immediately, Lord Grantham got himself dressed and called for a car. He had been headed toward the hospital when he remembered that Lady Mary had arrived in London herself that evening and therefore, Anna would be with her. He asked the driver to pull over as he thought for a moment. Should he go and get what news he could before telling Anna about her husband? Or should he go to her immediately? He tried to imagine himself in the same position and just the thought made him shudder with fear. Cora. Cora would be all he would want to see if he was in his final moments. And his girls, he'd want to gaze upon the faces of the women he loved most before joining their dearly departed sister in what lay on the otherside. If Bates was still alive it might not be for long and he deserved that time to be spent with the woman he loved more than life. There wasn't really a decision to be made after all and he asked the driver to turn around. With a whole new sense of urgency they made their way to the London house as quickly as possible, moving with ease along the nearly deserted London streets. Upon arriving he ran up the stairs straight for Lady Mary knowing how close the girls were. Anna would need a woman's comfort, the shoulder of a confidant. After the shock and sleep wore off Lady Mary's mind, father and daughter shared a touching embrace as they recognized the pain in each other's eyes. Mary saw that her father was incredibly worried over, not is valet, but his dear friend that had once saved his life. Robert recognized the fear and familiarity in Mary eyes that, not her maid, but her dear friend might be facing the life of a widow just as his poor daughter had much before their time.

Mary threw her simplest dress on before heading down to face Anna. Memories flooded her and she almost lost her footing on the great staircase. It was all too familiar a feeling. She wasn't sure if she could face the heartbreak she was about to deliver. She turned and pounded her fist against the wall as tears flowed from her eyes. Robert rushed to her side.

"Are you alright, my dear?" He asked, knowing nothing in this moment was alright. He knew this had to be striking a chord in his eldest and his heart ached for her. Mary turned to him and crashed against her father's chest.

"It's not fair, papa! After all they have been through! He can't leave Anna now, he just can't. She needs him. She can't get through this without him." Robert was confused at this statement, but said nothing, brushing it off as the ramblings of grief. "He can't be taken away from her, papa. He…he shouldn't have been taken away." Mary's sobs wracked her body, taking her father by surprise. His daughter was generally so stoic and steeled to the pain of others, giving the appearance that she was unsympathetic. But Robert now recognized that his daughter was grieving her husband all over again and he held her tight.

"Come now Mary, I know how hard this must be for you but think of Anna. She needs you now. You need to be strong for her. We all do. And we don't know anything yet. Bates might still be alive, but we need to get Anna to him as fast as possible." He pulled his daughter away from him and brushed a tear from her cheek. Mary's shoulders squared and she raised her head.

"You're right. It won't do to go to pieces, it won't help Anna." Mary thought fondly of her maid who had been such pillar, not just getting her through Matthew's death but through everything she had been through since she was a young woman facing her first season. Anna had always been so strong and brave, no matter what life threw at her. Mary had marveled at her strength during in the aftermath of the house party and she resolved then and there to be that pillar for her in her time of need, now and as long as she needed her. Mary breathed out forcefully and cleared her throat before making her way down to the servant's quarters. Robert left to get the housekeeper and the butler, giving Mary the privacy to alert Anna to the news alone. Taking a deep breath she knocked before opening the door.

Anna was sure the motor wasn't moving. How could it be taking so long to get to the hospital? She looked out the window and it seemed the world was passing in slow motion. She hadn't let the tears escape her; she was still too much in shock. She replayed Lord Grantham's words in her head, a torturous loop;

"We don't know anything. Some sort of accident. Sounded Grim. Dead or alive." The words fell around her not sinking in. This couldn't be happening, not now. Not when so much had been left unsaid between them. Everything now seemed so insanely trivial to her, except for him. Yet the weight of the past weeks weighed heavily on her. She keenly felt every refusal of every gesture, every token of his love and affections that she had rebuffed, on her angry and guilty shoulders. She had pushed him away with no evidence that he had done anything wrong. Now she might never get the chance to tell him how wrong and sorry she was. The guilt was suffocating. She had never doubted her husband in all the years she had known him. Never once believed he was anything less than a great man. Now doubt might be the last thing they had together. Suddenly she was gasping for breath. The cramped space of the car left her no room to run and hide from this reality. Why weren't they there yet? Why did this have to happen? Why now? Why did she have to be so unkind? Why him? Why? Why? Angry desperate questions thrown at a god who had seemed to forsake every moment of happiness they had ever shared.

Mary put her arm around Anna, whispering kind words of reassurance, reminding her to breathe.

"We're almost there Anna and then you'll see that he's alright. He's going to be alright. He has to be. He has to be…" Mary seemed to lose herself again for a moment before steeling and focusing back on her maid. "We're all here for you Anna. Whatever happens you'll never be alone." Anna nearly scoffed at this. She knew Lady Mary was genuine in what she said, but alone is all she could feel without him.

"Alone. There's nothing else without him, m'lady." Anna's tone was hard like cold stone and she didn't take her eyes away from the window. Mary glanced at her father sitting across from her with a look asking for help, but Robert seemed at a loss. Moments passed in heavy silence.

"Bates is the strongest man I have ever known, Anna. Think of all he's been through. A war and countless battles and he's always come through them, stronger than ever. This will be no different. I'm sure of it." He reached and placed his hand gently on top of her shaking hand. Finally, after what had felt like hours they pulled up to the hospital. Anna rushed to exit the motor and stopped at the steps of the great stone building. It was so foreboding looking at the first signs of the approaching dawn. Her fate lay within those doors. If he was alive than she would live. If he was gone, she would wither away until they were reunited in the heavens. At least there nothing else horrible could touch them. In heaven they would walk hand in hand for eternity, together, never to be parted. She felt her knees start to give until a strong arm took hers. She looked Lord Grantham in the eyes for the first time since being awoken and the courage in his eyes gave her a bit of her own. In a few moments the uncertainty would be gone. At least she would know their fate. This purgatory of not knowing was akin to an inner circle of hell. A deep breath was taken by all and they made their way in.

"John Bates." Lord Grantham stated abruptly. The nurse looked at Robert for a moment then to Lady Mary and Anna. Turning to the paperwork before her she nodded apparently finding his name in the ledger.

"May I ask who you are?" she questioned as she stood.

"I'm Lord Grantham, this is my daughter Lady Mary Crawley and this is Anna Bates, his wife." The nurse's eyes went immediately to the petite blonde who seemed to be shrinking by the minute. Despair in loved ones was not anything new to her but this woman looked so utterly destroyed; the veteran nurse's heart ached for her.

"Of course. Come this way. I'll fetch the doctor." She led them down a narrow hallway, all whitewashed and reeking of iodine and disinfectants. Anna felt her stomach wretch. The nurse disappeared through a door, instructing them to wait where they were. Anna fidgeted anxiously. She was fighting the urge to run through the hallways screaming his name until she found him; until she found her fate. She had never known such impatience in herself. She groaned in frustration when the door did not open after what she was sure had been an hour wasted, an hour they might not have.

"Mrs. Bates?" Anna solemnly nodded her head as the doctor finally approached. "I'm doctor Ashford. I was here when your husband was brought in…" Anna couldn't wait for these platitudes and her patience gave.

"Where is he?! Where's my husband!? Please I need to see him! I need to tell him! I…" The tears broke loose for the first time that night.

"Anna," Lady Mary whispered. "Anna, please let the doctor speak."

"Doctor please just tell us. Is Bates alive or is he…" Robert couldn't bring himself to say the word. The doctor looked sympathetically towards Anna and spoke softly.

"Your husband is alive, Mrs. Bates. He's gravely injured, but he's alive."

"Oh thank god." Robert muttered. Anna breathed out severely. It felt like she had been holding her breath for hours. He was alive. It wasn't too late. She wasn't too late.

"Please let me see him. I have to see him. I won't believe it until I do." She pleaded with the doctor, nearly begging as if the doctor was hiding him away.

"Of course. But Mrs. Bates, I must warn you. He's not awake. He's suffered a severe head injury. The truth is he might never wake up." Anna felt as if she had been punched in the gut, again. But he was alive she reminded herself.

"Please let me see him now. I need to tell him…" she trailed off but the doctor nodded that he understood.

"Come with me." She was sure they had walked a mile before they reached the door, her eyes searching every room trying to find him. Everything, all steps and notions of time seemed to be stretched to their breaking points. She turned to face her employers;

"Thank you both so much, but I need to be alone with him."

"Of course. We'll be waiting right here." Lady Mary said with a smile. The doctor held open the door and Anna walked in. Any resolution to be strong left her the instant her eyes found him lying in the rigid bed. The tears flowed and her whole body shook. His head was wrapped in a heavy bandage, his eye was a sickening shade of black and purple and horribly swollen. She couldn't even make out his lid or his long lovely lashes. He looked so small, quite a feat for someone who loomed large over all that came in his presence. The white of his hospital gown was shocked with a stain of crimson coming from his abdomen. She went immediately to his side and reached out for his hand, stopping to look at the doctor to make sure it was alright. He nodded with a weak smile of encouragement.

"As I said, Mrs. Bates, I can't tell you that he'll wake up, but it can be good for patients in such a state to hear the voices of their loved ones. I'll give you moment, but please feel free to talk to him." Dr. Ashford gave a bow of his head before leaving the husband and wife alone.

"Oh my love. John, please hear me. John, I love you so much. I was such a fool. I should have told you every day how much you mean to me. I should have had more faith in you. I'm so sorry I failed you. I shouldn't have let you leave as you did, who knows what you must have been thinking. But if you have ever thought for one moment, John Bates, that I don't love you with every beat of my heart you'd be so stupidly wrong. I love you. I love you so much. Please don't leave me now." She brought his hand up to her cheek and held it with every ounce of love and devotion she could muster; which for this man was an endless ocean. She held his hand close to her chest and gently traced his features with her other hand. It was a landscape she had only thought she had memorized previously, now it felt familiar and new all the same. She didn't want to ever forget a single crinkle of his eyes or how glorious the stubble of the day felt, rough like sand paper against her soft fingertips.

She sat by his side in silence for moments at a time before showering him again and again in praises of love and adoration. Then she would rage at the unfairness of life. Then she would pray the anger way. Sobs would escape her then and she would use his hand to help brush away the tears as he had done himself on so many occasions. This dizzying cycle of emotional highs and lows were stuck playing on a loop like a warped record when the needle stuck.

His hand was stiff and the warmth that usually radiated from him was nowhere to be found. It felt strange for his strong but nimble fingers not to curl around hers as they had so naturally every other time. They just fit that way, she and him. But she clung to it all the same. His hand would always feel so wonderful encompassing hers. She pulled the hard chair as close to the bed as possible so that she could gently lay her head on his chest. The steady thump of his heart was music to her ears. It was much more faint than their nights in the cottage, but it still sounded strong and steady to her. A sigh of relief left her as did another prayer before she felt herself succumbing to the rhythm and the emotion of the day.

She hadn't drifted off for long when the sound of the door opening brought her back to awareness. She wiped her eyes with her free hand and turned to face the visitors. She was surprised to find a constable with the doctor and the Crawley's. It was then she realized that she still had no explanation for her husband's current state. Up until this moment she hadn't cared, hadn't even thought about what terrible misfortune had brought him here. All that mattered was that he was still here. He was breathing, his heart was pumping and she could hold his hand. She couldn't care about anything else.

"Anna, it appears as though Bates was involved in some sort of altercation." Lord Grantham spoke up just as it appeared the constable was going to, figuring he would be gentler than the officer.

"An altercation?" Anna shook her head as if she didn't understand the words, her eyes not leaving John's face.

"Yes, ma'am. From our witness's account your husband is quite the hero." The young officer smiled at this hoping to bring a bit of joy into a grim situation as Anna turned to face him in surprise of the statement.

"A hero?" She turned her gaze back to her husband and silently admonished him lovingly in her mind. 'Of course you would be, you foolish man.'

"Yes, ma'am. Your husband came along some men who were apparently troubling a young woman in an alley. He intervened and I do believe he saved that young lady from certain tragedy. Unfortunately, this is the price paid for such courage. He gave two of them a bit of a thrashing before a third came at him. That man had a…um…well, he was armed." The officer was getting visibly uncomfortable.

"Yes, you see Mrs. Bates. Your husband was stabbed in the abdomen." Anna gasped at the news, her eyes trailing back to the red blotch on his gown. Of all the events that could have led to his condition this was not what she was expecting. "Thankfully the wound wasn't that deep and his organs were missed. He received help quick enough to manage the blood loss and we were able to close the wound easily. If that had been his only injury he would be right as rain in a few days time. However…" Anna looked to his bandaged head, and brushed her hand across his cheek. "It would seem that after he was stabbed one of the attackers kicked his injured leg out from under him and when he fell he hit his head on the wall and then again on the ground. The men then kicked…"

"Thank you doctor, I think Mrs. Bates understands enough." Lord Grantham interjected. Anna felt flashes of rage at the despicable men who had done this intermixed with pride at her husband's actions and sorrow that his noble heart might very well have led to his demise.

"Oh John…you brave stupid man." She whispered into his palm before placing a gentle kiss. "Is…is the woman alright? The woman he saved?"

"A few bruises and superficial cuts, but more shaken up than anything. And she's very grateful for your husband, Mrs. Bates." The doctor offered. She nodded as more tears slid silently down her cheeks. She was amazed she had any left in her.

"I'm afraid we'll have to ask you some questions ma'am." The officer broke the silence meekly.

"Questions for Anna, but what could she know? She wasn't there, thank god. Don't you think she's been through enough? You have a witness, get what you need from her!" Lady Mary was incensed.

"I'm sorry, m'lady, it's just protocol. We need to know why Mr. Bates was out at such an hour." The officer looked like a scolded puppy, put out in the yard by a stern master.

"Mr. Bates has been in London here with me this last week. Mrs. Bates only arrived yesterday evening with my daughter. She hasn't seen or spoken to him in as much time." Lord Grantham was just as stern as his daughter hoping to spare Anna any unnecessary distress at an interrogation. Anna offered a nod to confirm what Lord Grantham had just said. "Ask me what you will, but leave her in peace." The constable nodded and made a motion for the men to leave the room. Lord Grantham nodded in agreement.

"Anna, this only confirms what we've known all along about your husband. He is a brave and courageous man with a noble heart. He'll pull through." With a smile the earl left the room, the doctor and Lady Mary following. Anna turned back to her husband and again brought his hand to her lips.

"You saved a woman's life tonight, my love. Sounds like you. You save my life every day. Please wake up and let me show you how proud I am of you. Please wake up and tell me you love me, as much as I love you. Please John…" Moments in heavy silence passed, before the doctor a nurse came in.

"I'm afraid we're going to have to take a look at his wounds and change the dressings Mrs. Bates. Might I suggest this as a good time to get some rest. You can return later this afternoon."

"No! I don't want to leave him. I can't leave him. He needs me. You said he needs to hear me. What if he wakes up and I'm not here!" The sobs were coming back and she could feel herself becoming hysterical but the thought of leaving him was torture for her already fragile mind. Hearing Anna's pleas Lady Mary came swiftly to her side from the hall. The doctor turned to Lady Mary hoping she might be able to see reason.

"We need to tend to Mr. Bates' wounds. It can be grim. I suggested that Mrs. Bates leave and have a rest. She can return in just a few hours." Lady Mary nodded in acknowledgment. Anna would need rest and a bite to eat if she was going to keep up her strength for this battle.

"Anna, come now, we should let the doctor do what he needs to help Bates. He only wants to make him more comfortable. You need rest, so you can be fighting fit for him when you come back. He needs you to be strong for him now. He wouldn't want to see you wasting away in here." She put her hands on the maid's shoulders gently, giving a squeeze for encouragement before applying soft pressure pulling her from the chair. Anna began to rise, but stooped to place a feather light kiss on her husband's lips leaving an 'I love you' behind on them. When she stepped into the hall she saw Lord Grantham giving his information to the officer then turning to the doctor to assure him to spare no expense and do everything in his power to bring Bates back to health.

"There isn't much to do except wait, unfortunately. But we'll make sure he's most comfortable." Dr. Ashford turned his attention to Anna, taking her hand in a polite shake. "I assure you, Mrs. Bates, your husband is in good hands. I'll check back with you later this afternoon."

"Thank you doctor." Anna managed an exhausted smile and reciprocated the hand shake. As they began walking down the hall another officer came out of a room a few doors down followed by a young blonde. The woman looked skittishly around her before her eyes met Anna's. Anna was taken aback by how much this woman resembled herself. It was almost as if she was looking into a mirror of the past when she had been no more than eighteen, as this woman in front of her had to have been, not much older certainly. Anna knew immediately from recognizing the look in the woman's eyes that this had been the woman John had saved. Driven by an inner compulsion and the knowledge that this woman was nearly condemned to the same nightmare as she had been subject to, Anna reached out for the woman's hands taking them tightly in her own. 'She's just a girl,' she thought with a heavy heart. The girl startled at the gesture before seeing the compassion in Anna's eyes.

"Are you…Anna?" the girl's voice was merely a broken whisper. Anna was surprised herself that the girl had spoken her name.

"How did you…"

"I heard him say it, just before those men…it was almost as if he thought I was you… I'm so sorry for what happened to him. But…" she was unsure if she should go on, looking down at her feet. "But, I'm ever so grateful he was there." The guilt and shame hung heavy in the statement. Anna only held the girl's hands tighter.

"I know. At least if this had to happen, it was for some purpose. That's the kind of man he is. He's always been my hero, always." Anna was surprised at how true these words were when they left her mouth. She had never genuinely blamed him for what happened to her, but there were times when her inexplicable anger raged that she had wanted to put some fault on him. That if maybe he had only followed her to make sure she was alright…but these thoughts left her mind as fast as they came. He was without fault. As was she. Two absolute truths that had taken their time to come into knowledge.

"Well, he's mine now as well." The girl said through a teary smile. "I shall pray for him, every day. And please thank him for me. Thank him for saving my life."

"I will…umm…"

"Lily, my name's Lily."

"I will tell him Lily." Anna said with a smile. She pulled the girl into her arms for a quick hug, whispering into her ear ever so softly. "You'll be alright. I know what it must have been like, believe me. But you'll pull through. Just as I did. One day at a time."


End file.
